Deep Notches

These last two days have been a slight challenge for me. Stress tends to trigger some negative feelings and behaviors. Expected of everyone — doubly so from the schizophrenic! What sort of psycho would I be not to deliver?

On top of it all, each time the seasons change I get an odd sense of nostalgia. Is it just me? I’m not sure from whence the feeling originates either, unless it’s simply memories of say, the last time it felt like this outside which would have been well over six months ago. But this isn’t six-months-ago-nostalgia. This is cave man experience first orgasm nostalgia. Or, first cave man lose first cave mother nostalgia. Is it odd for me to list these two scenarios next to each other? Worthy of equally deep notches on the cave wall, if you ask me.

I have noticed some little things have gone missing. A few of the keys on my keyboard (the Z, X, and P, as well as the Right control key and the 7 from the number pad) have disappeared. My cell phone’s been missing since yesterday. There are linoleum panels gone from the kitchen floor. There was never anything underneath them as I suspected. The sole of my left shoe has gone in such a way it left behind no trace of a sever.
I’m worried that if things continue disappearing the whole situation could evolve from a small annoyance to the complete disappearance of my very fucking self.

Stay tuned to find out!


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Filed under mad ruminations, nostalgia, schizophrenia, writing

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