Well, our date went pretty well last night. I really like this girl. I feel I can have a good time with her, while still being able to talk to her about more serious things.
We ate copious amounts of sushi and only spent a couple hours at the party. She drank, I didn’t. We ended up coming back to my place and she’s still here as we speak, sleeping soundly in my bed.
She says she likes poetry, though I don’t think she’s actually read a poem in years. She is interested to read some of mine, which might be enough to scare her off forever. Guess we’ll find out.
I told her about my bipolar disorder, and her first response was, “how bad is it?”. I gave her the truth. She told me that she had already had a feeling about me, like i may have some sort of issues. Caught me off guard. She seemed a little uncomfortable with the whole conversation, and hell, so was I, but her interest in me didn’t seem to wane. I feel better her knowing. Otherwise it’s like I’m being deceptive just by being around her. Can’t have that.
I mean this in the best way possible, but at first glance, you would not think she’s very smart. It must be the beauty. She is, though. We chatted about nearly everything and she’s a good conversationalist. I feel comfortable talking to her, and that’s important. At times that’s all I need–someone to talk to.
To sum things up, this could be the beginning of a meaningful relationship. I truly hope that my heart is in the right place–that I’m with her because of her, and not because I simply am afraid of being alone. I feel that both elements are at play here. I don’t know if all this is a good idea, but I will soon enough. It feels like a good idea. Can I trust it?